digest
Short Summary
Main recommendation: young men should consider going out with women who are older than them, since maturity can make a better wife, mother, and partner in shared goals. Rav Paysach Krohn illustrates this with Rav Shimshon Refael Hirsch, who married a woman four years older than him, and with a later real-life match that followed from Rav Krohn's talk.
Key Points
- Rav Krohn's central example is Rav Shimshon Refael Hirsch, whose wife was four years older; Rav Krohn says Hirsch viewed marriage as a team meant to accomplish goals in family, community, and Klal.
- According to Rav Krohn, Hirsch reasoned that he needed an ezer kenegdo and that an older, more mature wife could help guide him in his work.
- Rav Krohn argues older women are often more mature and can be better wives, mothers, and helpmates, and may also earn more.
- Rav Krohn said he spoke on this at a 2006 Torah Umesorah convention to encourage young men to date older women and to reassure older women they are not "out of the ballpark."
- The speaker reports that a mother who heard the talk persuaded her 24-year-old son to date a 26-year-old woman, a descendant of Rav Hirsch, and they married.
Details Worth Noting
- Concrete instructions: The transcript gives no step-by-step method for dating or matchmaking. The actionable advice is: be open to dating women older than you, consider maturity and partnership qualities, and, per the video's program, daven together on Tuba of for anyone who needs a shidduch.
- Context: Rav Krohn led a group of about 70 people from America and Canada to Frankfurt, Prague, and Vienna, and at Frankfurt they visited Rav Hirsch's grave beside his wife, Kana Yudel.
- The talk was given at a convention with about 700 women present, where Rav Krohn spoke in place of Rav Scheinberg, who was unwell that year.
- The mother's son and his wife had Rav Krohn, who has been a mohel for 55 years, perform the bris for their first son, named Shimshon; their second child was born on Rav Hirsch's yahrzeit and also named Shimshon.
- The story is one speaker's account of personal anecdotes and is presented as encouragement, not as general evidence about marriage outcomes.
Bottom Line
The video is a motivational story urging openness to older brides, anchored in Rav Hirsch's marriage and one reported match, and it asks listeners to pray for people seeking shidduchim.
